WARNING : This review is likely to be long, rambling and far too enthusiastic for its' own good. I admit, I'm not a deep, thoughtful, insightful reviewer, I'm just following the advice of Roy Walker from Catchphrase, "Say what you see"

This review's dedicated to...you know who you are.


I read this in one go last night. I slept in and missed my bus to my training course this morning because of it. Do I care?

Do I f...

It's been about thirteen-and-a-half hours since I finished reading it and I'm *still* bouncing around the room with a big silly grin on my face. Yes, I think it's *that* good.

Beforehand I was worried. No matter how inadvertantly, an immense amount of hype and expectation built up in the weeks, even months before it's release. The three week wait to get hold of a copy just made it worse. Would it live up to expectations? Would it be crap?(Yeah I know, unlikely) Or would it just be slightly disappointing?(Which at times, is even worse than just being crap.)

At least I can read all those posts I've been ignoring all month...

Well, I loved it. At this moment I can only think of a single thing about it that I didn't really like. Of course, when I re-read it at sometime in the future, I'll probably go "Ooh, not sure about that now...", but at the moment. Lance...

Good work fella!

I'm just going to go through the book and highlight stuff I liked and that.

(That is *awful* sentence contruction, I don't care, I'm happy!)

WARNING : Mucho grande gigante spoilers follow!

Dedications page : Amanda Dingle

A laugh before the book even starts.

Part One : Battle Of The Planets


Opening chapter. Nice, atmospheric. I've always found locations and people very easy to imagine in Lance's books, which only adds to the overall effect. Just a few pages in and already, mystery and robot monsters. Just what you wanted from Who as a kid (and in my case,still do...)

Love the conversation on the swings between the Doctor and Miranda,all the stuff about why their breath doesn't condensate in the cold air. Subtley played.

At first, thought the black Volkswagen was the Doctor's. Also thought of Knight Rider at first, especially when it spoke. But then...well,needless to say I can see what started that Transformers thread a couple of weeks ago.

Zevron and Sallak. Proper villains, with proper reasons and motivations for what they're doing. It's always better when you can *believe* in the villains.

For some reason, I'm picturing Sallak as Steven Berkoff. Not sure why.

The Doctor as a yuppie? McGann was in something about city dealers once wasn't he? I keep picturing the Doctor with glasses at this point.

No idea why.

Get a warm, fuzzy Grange Hill type feeling during much of this section.

The sonic suitcase! Another daft idea, handled brilianty.

(I'm really trying not to sound like the kid in the Fast Show, "Isn't Father time BRILLIAAAANNNT!?!?!" but I'm having difficulty...)

p201, the only bit of the book I have any real criticism about. I'm a bit worried that implying that intevention by the Doctor resulted in the fall of the Berlin Wall seemed to take away from the real people who *did*. I don't know why I feel like that about it, but it's the only bit of the book that jars a bit.

'Then we'll just have to steal it.'

Ha-haaaaa! One of those real, punch the air, shout "YES!" and feel good about life in general moments from Doctor Who.

It's absurd, it's far-fetched, but you don't care. You're so caught up in the story Lance could have Yartek, leader of the alien Voord return to help the Doctor save Miranda and you'd take it in your stride.

On the first description of Farran's ship, I was reminded of The Needle from TID. Then after it was described a bit more I thought, War TARDIS! Then upon further description, Faran suddenly became Kurtwood Smith and the Supremacy became the big ship from ST:V's story "The Year In Hell"

The Supremacy's power source, a big globe with time-energies in it?Another TID ref?

Hold on, he just said "The Needle"...

Miranda's people were, if not Time Lords, at least Gallifreyan.

Bloody 'ell!

For a brief moment, thought Miranda and her bunch of "anarchists" from millions of years in the future and several galaxies away might be the ones who eventually become the People?

Care to comment Mr. Parkin?

The images in the globe. I recognise a few. Is that Larna?

"I wondered when I'd put in an appearance."

Right in the middle of the climactic closing scenes, Lance has me creased up with laughter.

And the end, poignant but hopeful. I really hope we see what happens to Miranda someday.

I've left out so much! The definitive (imho) eighth Doctor, all the musical references, the entire eighties vibe about it. It's a nostalgia trip. (And coincides with the BBC showing their I Love TheEighties series, serendiptiy or what?)

Lance said in an interview somewhere that Doctor Who had never actually done a proper story set in the proper eighties.

It has now.

<cue dual drummers>

"So put down that Terrance[1], and do yourself a favour! That book has lost it's taste, so try another flavour!

Lance Parkiiiiiiin! Lance Parkiiiiiiiin!"

[1] - Terrance chosen because his name was the first I could think of, I actually like his stuff. Apart from 8Docs...

And I'm sure there's piles of stuff I've missed and won't notice until I read it again. I may write a more coherent review then...

Yes this sounds like the most suck-uppy (Is that a word? It is now!) review ever, but I don't care, I love it! But just so Mr. Parkin's head doesn't expand to the extent the BBC could use it as a station ident, I'll have to say something bad about him...

...I once saw him reading one of the K9 kid's books.

And enjoying it!

(cue shock, horror, anarchy and the fall of civilisation...)